Borrowing Faith
If you are like me, dear Christian, you have experienced seasons in your life of great spiritual growth: you were delighted to serve the Lord and His church. You continuously praised God for His goodness and often found yourself before the Throne making requests, exuberant that He loved to hear your prayers. You felt deep conviction and your ears were attune to the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit. When reading your Bible, the words leapt off the page and rooted in your heart, filling you with joy and wonder as you meditated on them throughout the day.
But, if you are like me, you have also endured seasons of stagnancy, of indifference, of an almost palpable distance between you and God; when reading the Bible and praying a prayer felt like an impossible, useless task. You had no desire for the things you knew would bring you the most joy. In these times I have often thought, with a strange mix of terror and carelessness, “Am I even a Christian?”
We know that we are saved by grace through faith (Ephesians 2:8). The Holy Spirit gives us this great gift of faith, and He gives it so joyfully, so freely, so unendingly. Faith is not a commodity whose stores may be depleted. Rather, it is a gift of unlimited supply - a gift which must be “worked out,” but a gift nonetheless. Our works do not save us, and yet our works are essential evidence to the saving work of the Spirit within us.
But this “working out” is tiring. The race I’m supposed to be running hurts my muscles and I don’t think I have the stamina for it. Sometimes it feels pointless and hopeless and it seems like everyone else has got it all nailed down except for me. I don’t want to read His Word, and I definitely don’t want to pray and face God, the God of costly love whom I don’t seem to have any affection for. Perhaps I’m coddling sin, perhaps I’m struggling with idolatry or I’m oppressed by lies from the enemy. Or, like I said, maybe I’m just tired and I feel discouraged.
This, my friend, is why God in His mercy has given us the church; siblings in the faith to link arms with and hold you up just as you hold them up. When our struggles and doubts have us in a spiritual desert, God gives us fellow believers, who know us and love us, as an oasis. So, drink. Drink in another’s faith like a cup of cold water from the inexhaustible well of Living Water. When your own heart whispers lethal doubts, allow them to speak truth to you, even if it doesn’t quite stick in the moment. Reap hope from another ordinary sinner believing this truth, and choose to believe that if the Lord can write His truth upon their heart, He can write it upon yours as well. Pray for God to rescue you from the toxic shame that they are a “better” Christian than you; I promise you, there will be someone someday who needs to hear truth from you. It may even be this friend.
Even in times of flourishing, our life experiences or our dispositions may make it hard for us to believe certain truths in God’s Word. The gospel is wildly scandalous, backwards, and beyond human comprehension - and yet this makes it fiercely beautiful. Maybe you don’t understand how God could treasure you because so many others have mistreated you. Maybe you’re a perfectionist and don’t understand how God accepts you despite your messiness. Maybe you don’t understand how God could love you unconditionally, for who you are, because everyone else’s love has always come with strings attached. Invite others into your wrestling and rest in their confidence. Continue running the race knowing that they will pick you up when you trip. Keep fighting to pursue the Lord through His Word and prayer, even when you feel nothing, believing in faith that He will multiply your faith and reward your obedience. Do not fear to need others at the cost of not being blessed through them. It won’t be long before they need you, too. Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.
Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5:11